It occured to me the other day that I stress daily about what needs to be done and what I didn't get done, which ultimately makes me feel like I failed, as there is always something that didn't get done. Well, here's reality, there will ALWAYS be something that could have been done but didn't. And I mean ALWAYS.
My child doesn't need a perfect mom, she needs a good mom. They need to be healthy and happy and have food and clothes and shelter and love. I CAN do that. I can't be everywhere all the time, but I CAN be in the important places when it matters most. I can't never have a pile of laundry, but I CAN keep favorite clothes clean and ready to go. I can't keep a full kitchen all the time, but I CAN keep healthy foods, her favorites, in stock. And although I may not be able to tuck her in every single night, but I CAN find a way to do it most nights, as often as possible.
THOSE ar ethe things that they will remember. They remember that you read to them, that you loved them, that you always had cheese sandwiches or peanut butter, and that you saw their Christmas plays and scared away the monsters on Halloween, or wearing their favorite pajamas every night because mommy somehow always had them ready. I don't need to do everything, I just need ot focus on the most important things and keep my priorities. Sometimes that means I get a babysitter and go to work for a few hours, sometimes it means only one bedtime story so I can run the dishwasher. I need to be good enough.
Now, at night, I don't list all the things I didn't do, I take a moment to think of all the things I DID do, all the things that don't have to be done tomorrow because I finished it alreay. This makes me feel like if I accomplished that much in one day, I can do so much more tomorrow!