Oh my pet peeves are raging this week!! I'm not sure what started it up, but man oh man. I decided to share a few of the worst ones with you, so you can share my pain or laugh at my experiences.
1. If I ask you a question, ANSWER IT! It makes me crazy when people hear you ask a question and don't even acknowledge it. 2. When you say "Can I ask you a question?" the next words you say should be a stinking question! 3. When it snows an hour after I finish shovelling. 4. People who say they want one of your garage sale items then you never hear from them again. Just pick it up if you want it, I clearly want it out of my house. 5. When people who barely know you talk bad about your business/webpage/whatever, with no knowledge of how any of those actually operate. Don't worry, I'm sure I'll have lots more to add, this cold weather is bringing impatience and r
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It happens. We all judge. Sometimes we can keep it to ourselves and sometimes it sneaks out.
I've had other mommies judge me, but the secret is I judge myself harsher then they ever could. I know it's not healthy, but you expect everyone to judge everything you do, so you start to judge yourself. Was that the right decision? Am I too strict? Do I use too early a bedtime? The thing is you need to find what works for your own family. Yes, others will judge you. It's simply human nature to compare what you do with what others do. Sometimes, it comes across as rude and mean, or condescending. Sometimes these moms aren't really trying to judge you, they are judging themselves as compared to you and this is how it comes out. Perhaps they feel that you are handling situations better then they are, and they are truly judging themselves and not you. Bonding together, sharing stories and experience, and helping each other to remember that just like we are different out children and families are different as well helps. Each famiy works in a different way. Judging others and ourselves only makes it harder for everyone, and isn't very beneficial. We will keep doing it though, whether we mean to or not, but we must keep out judgements to ourselves. OR we can form close groups of mommies and help take the pressure off each other. No mom needs more negative pressures on them. We are hard enough on ourselves without being hard on each other. Clearly I grew up in the 80's. You can tell because I wasn't allowed to say "I'm bored", and I owned niether a game system, hand-held game system, or VCR. Yup, forget DVD, computers, or BlueRay, I didn't even have a VCR! Telling someone you were bored or had nothing to do carried some heavy consequences.
In the spirit of my energy diet and helping parents and kids everywhere, here are some of my childhood solutions to boredom: -homework. I always hear parents today complaining about how much homework their kids get, yet I'm always hearing there's nothing for them to do. Well, they can do their homework then -teach them to READ. Not to skim over text books or assignments, but to pick up a book, read and process the words, and create pictures with their imagination. (an imagination is that thing we used to think of things to do and make before electronics took over) -teach them something, absoutely anything. 5 year olds can do a lot more then people think. Sure, they can't use the stove or oven alone, but they can make the mix (they also learn reading, measuring, math) or they can learn to print, handwrite (yup, I know it's a lost art, but doesn't that just make it cooler to know?) help them learn a card game or another language, teach them an instrument. Young minds learn faster then adults, and they are starved for information. Find what they like and encourage it. -let them do chores. Yup, I said "let" and not "make". Catch them while they are young enough that helping is fun and they will develop habits you want them to have later. Don't like things put away wrong? Do they load the dishwasher differently then you? Well guess what, you had kids knowing they would change your life, so just don't look. Let them do it and if it bothers you that much either seek help or fix it when they are in bed, and don't complain about it. Sure, I like my plates facing a certain way, but I also like to wear clean pants, I've learned neither of those are as important as forming an amazing child into a wonderful adult. -help them pick a hobby -give them a chalk board -create a playroom or area, and make them responsible for it. When they enter that space they are to find their own things to do, amuse themselves, create rules, and clean it up when they are done. Don't tell them all the time where every single stuffed animal or little car goes, let them have a little space all their own. They won't ever learn how they want their own home set up if you don't let them learn, and you don't want them to grow up and move out into a big mess, you'll want to visit them and if you don't let them learn to organize you won't like their place later... -sent them outside with a piece of cardboard and don't let them back in for a whole half hour -stop telling them how to play. If they don't learn how to do it themselves they will forever need you to amuse them -get them involved in A sport. I'm not saying spend hundreds or thousands on fees and uniforms, I'm saying take them to the park with a basketball and teach them what to do with it. Show them how to play tag, show a few neighborhood kids how to play baseball or softball. We used to all meet at the park with aball and play soccor, no coaches, parents, or referees. We knew the rules, we knew how to play fair, and I'm not even sure we kept score. I don't know when all sports became organized sports, but I think they are missing out on a lot of fun. I think that by organzing and arranging every minute of every day, our children are not learning how to make their own decisions, are not learning how to spend their time or to plan for themseves, and I think that these are skills we all need as adults. It's our job to m Here it is, the first in my ways to save money and energy! To start off, I am working on ways to do it without altering your life at all, then I'll work on slightly bigger changes. Let's be honest though, we all live the way we do because it works for us, and we need to maintain a way of life that will still work. Unplug your cell phone charger
Turn off the breaker to your outdoor plug at night and turn it back on when you get up in the morning, a car only needs to be plugged in for 2 hours Unplug your laptop when not using it (or when it is in use but fully charged) This will also save money on replaceing the battery Use a toaster oven when possible (also keeps the house cooler in the summer) Turn down your furnace at night, you will sleep better and save! Invest in quality plastic containers for your baking goods and other pantry items. They will last longer then cheap or disposable solutions and keep food fresher longer too Let your hair air dry a bit before you use the hair dryer Unplug appliances when not in use (NOT the fridge...) blenders, stereos, coffee pots, etc Turn off lights when you leave a room Plan computer usage so you can turn it on once and get everything done We all know out kids will start driving one day. It's our job to do everything we can to keep them safe in our own cars and teach them to be safe in their own. I've learned a few things along the way that are small and easy to do but can make a big difference.
1. Never leave your registration and insurance in the vehicle. This can be useful in a few situations: someone steals your car and gets stopped, sometimes they can talk themselves out because try have valid registration and insurance, so unless the car is reported stolen they are just "borrowing" it from a friend. If the info isn't in there then they raise suspicion even if you don't know it's gone yet. Or, someone breaks into your car now they have your name, address, and other info. 2. Keep your cell phone charged, or an emergency replacement (some are available for under $20 and plug into any phone for a small boost) If you are lost or break down one call can make all the difference 3. Lock the doors when in the car. This can keep strangers out and children in. 4. Always use a seatbelt. You want your kids to wear one when they are older so teach them now. 5. Keep an emergency kit. I hope you never need to use it. 6. Learn how to change a tire. Teach children old enough to drive, or with friends old enough to drive, how to change one as well. I know that you are all lookirng at this and wondering what is wrong with me that I find fear in everything. Well, that's not exactly true, but sometimes its' close...
Boxing day is the day we all put out our Christmas present boxes for recycling. Well, that's how it started anyway. So I'm driving around town thinking, dang, I didn't get it all out and I'm going to have boxes left. Small boxes as I don't usually get large gifts, and because I keep the bigger boxes for use later. So I'm learning what all my community members got for Christmas. Big screen TV. New computer. Furniture. Electronics. It's the electronics that really get me. As far as I'm concerned this is a day that we all put up a sign out front that says "Hey theives, check out all the great new stuff with serial numbers I haven't yet recorded that I got" Really? Do you want to announce that you have a house full of new expensive stuff so soon after people spent all their money? No, this doesn't mean I'm out to get your stuff. No, it doesn't mean I think eveyrone is out to steal things. There are some wonderful safe neighborhoods. I'm just saying, if someone is desperate, do you want to tell them what you have? My solution? Break the boxes down and fold them decorated side in, or put them all in another box. I don't really think people are driving around looking at your recyling, and honestly, if they are going to break in somewhere then they will. It just seems to me like putting it all proudly full sized on your front lawn is as good as a billboard. Simple ways to relieve this new worry I instilled? 1. Fold boxes with the label in, or even break them down so they look smaller. This also makes it easier for the people who pick up your recyling, they probably don't enjoy cramming all the large boxes into the truck (I've seen the size of the opening they go through, sometimes they have to fold or break the box themselves...) 2. Keep some boxes to store things in, or to install your a/c in the summer. Let your kids build forts with them or decorate them. This gives them an actual useful purpose and keeps them off the streets (the kids AND the box) 3. Disperse them among a couple recyling days 4. Take them directly to the recyling depot in your area. 5. Cut them and use them as kindling in your fireplace or for summer camp fires (seems silly now, but come spring you'll be scrambling for something to start that fire with!) 6. Give them to someone We all worry about how hard it will be for out kids to learn to be away from us, but what about us?
It's been a few years since I've started being away from her for a while at a time, but I still have random flare ups of separation anxiety. What if she's crying? Who will cuddle her, or kiss her ouchie better? Sure, her dad or grandma will be there, or a babysitter at worst case, but it's just not the same. I want to make her feel better, I want to make her feel loved, I want to make sure she has enough loves and cuddles every day. Unfortunately she's growing up and I can't hide behind the same excuses I use when she was born, and busy life and issues play a growing part, so I must just learn to adjust. I must conquer my anxiety and find a way to trust other people to keep my girl safe. This may be the hardest thing I do. Deep breaths, extra chocolate, lots of texts messages and phone calls, and an early bedtime are my coping mechanisms. The busier I am the less I think about it. It's still so hard... Tips and tricks to control my separation anxieties? |