While speaking with another mom today, I was again reminded how quicky they grow. Due to circumstances mine is maturing a little faster then I'd like. Because she is back and forth and goes to daycare, she has to learn to be a little more independant then I was prepared for at this age. There are moments though when I'm reminded just how little she is, and how much she still needs me.
This has lead me to wonder, do our children grow up, or do they grow away from us? We do everything for them when they are little, and it can be very exciting when they can do things for themselves, it means we are teaching them things and they are learning from us, that they are learning independance, and that we have just a little bit less to do every day. I like the little bit less to do, but then I remember that this means she needs me just a little less too... Heartbreaking.
Every time she does something for herself or I watch her choose clothes that I would never partner, I think about how many other things she will be doing for herself soon. I feel as though time is passing so quickly and I want her to still need me. Part of me knows that no matter how old she gets I'll always be her mommy and she'll always need me just a little, but I still miss how it used to be. When she gives me a hug and goes off to play at school I feel so proud of her and yet sad all at the same time. I worry that instead of just growing up, she will grow away from me.
She is very much her own little person. She knows what she likes and what she doesn't, she pick clothes I would never put together, she eats foods that I wouldn't think she'd like, and she chooses toys I wouldn't have played with. I know she's mine, but I see her growing more and more into her own and I hope that we will always be able to bridge the gap of our differneces and stay close.
I guess this is part of the wonder of being a mom, watching them grow and develop is exciting, scary, and sometimes a little sad. The more they can do themselves, the less we need to do, and the less they need us. I hope that